Well, this week has been an outstanding week of training. I may well get a little more in this afternoon but feel inclined to have a brief rest at the same. I guess I’m being lazy but sometimes lazy’s ok. I’ve finished off the majority with a good run whilst dressed like an eskimo due to the layers I put on.  6k and 3 T shirts later and I’m a kg or so lighter than when I woke up this morning. Running does that.  I’ve managed 3 or 4 this week as well getting a healthy dose of martial action in my life.

It’s funny how things begin to change  when you set yourself goals. Yesterday I stepped in the ring for the first time in well over a year just to have fun and get some cobwebs off in an interclub. I got well matched with a lad in his early 20’s who’s had 14 MMA fights and is on the verge of going pro.

Firstly, he was better than me and secondly I did well and although it wasn’t brilliant I stood my ground and gave it to him when I could. I stepped out the ring feeling like I wanted to get back in there again. May is very much in my sights but I have a hell of a lot work to do or being honest I won’t last 2 minutes in there.

Fighting is a big commitment but it’s still worth my time, so here we go again. And if for whatever reason I don’t get a definite match for then I’m still heading out there regardless and I think will come away hungrier than I feel already. If I do fight win or lose I’ll be the same.

I was quite pleased to get someone with the same sort of experience as me, he was also younger than me to so standing my ground and holding my own at points was good. I’ve got a lot to work on and I’d forgotten that there’s a big difference between putting it together in the ring and putting it together on a bag or pads.

My one criticism of my current gym is that we spend too much time warming up and really don’t seem to focus on shadow boxing at all. You can shadow box but it’s usually when you have the chance. To me, that’s really unusual as every gym I’ve trained at previously always has a couple of minutes to shadow box at the beginning. I think Sitsongpeenong was slightly different but we still got expected to do it.

When it comes to fighting now and then, I’ve had some tough fights so far. It doesn’t come easy but it’s eventually got better and I almost regret having a year out as it feels like I have to start from scratch. I do my best to remain humble about what I can and can’t do but refuse to let people put me down and discourage me out of anything I want to do. If person x can do it then why can’t I? super simple stuff. I manage my own expectations without needing people to do it for me.

For me, even if I lose and I do my best I know that I’ve done my best. What’s most important is that I know I am capable of winning and have achieved that before and I now know I can fight guys with similar experience and feel comfortable in there with them. Yesterday showed me that even though it was only an interclub  I’ve got a lot of work to do and although I may not feel that confident at the moment I’m looking forward to some real graft.

I have to manage and pep talk myself through the difficult bits because there’s no one there to do it for me. I don’t think many people seem to want to know sometimes but I know that when I’m at my best I’m a good fighter. Fuck age, I’m only young. Fuck limits they are only self imposed. I’ve been staring at a glass ceiling for the past 12 months or so  and I think it’s about time I tried to punch through again.

At the risk of sounding melodramatic  I’m still here and if I can be the best I can that’s the main thing. If you meet me you’ll realize if you talk to me about fighting I don’t see it all  as blood and guts as sometimes I make it sound. I’m still very passionate about it but ultimately  it’s good fun and I really love the combat.

I think the first thing I said after yesterday was “it was a good challenge!” and from previous experience competing for real it only ever brings out the best in me. So here I am and 3 T shirts later I still feel just as inspired and motivated as I did yesterday. In fact, I feel free. Have a good week  and just like the last time.. I’ll see you on that road.