Still brave.

I’ve trained Monday through to Saturday this week and it’s good to be able to put in the work. I think really training 6 days a week although it’s a big commitment is the best way for me to go to start to make some real improvements  and to keep myself in good shape and sharp.

I made the mistake yesterday of running about 4k or so as my leg hadn’t been feeling too bad throughout the week. After a bit of bag work yesterday morning those familiar shooting pains started heading up and down my shin.That’s never a good thing and I think despite wanting to step it up as a paradox, I need to slow down a little to let my leg heal.

We spent Monday this week focusing on a bit of fire in training, and pushing myself I could feel my leg complaining but on the plus side of things it was still a good session. I decided to also start sparring Thai again this week, as I have had a couple of weeks just boxing sparring. Rusty and over cautious was how I felt but I decided to get stuck in anyway.

There was a couple of tough rounds that made me pick things up this week, and that really is the way it should be. We’ve worked some good drills too. Training yesterday morning I was pleased to discover I’m beginning to open my hips more on my left kick, and as its my Muay Thai battle axe I want to make it as good as I can possibly get it. It’s got a lot of work that needs doing but its improving. Sometimes it’s just the little things in life that make me happy.

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Me vs Neil Owen (FSC gym) October 2014  fight no 12 and a 5 round clinch war that ended in a draw.

Throughout training this week I’ve been pushing through a bit of self doubt that always rears it’s head just when I really don’t need it too. I guess really when it comes down to it that’s my old friend fear coming back again just like he promised last week but  with a different hat on. I’ve put most of it down to the fact that I’m carrying an injury that keeps flaring up so I’ve done my best to ignore it, but being human and at points being hyper sensitive to every comment, criticism and any other sling and arrow that is fired my way it’s managed to successfully fuck with me.

When I first started fighting  I lost my first seven fights. When that had happened and I had fight number eight rearing it’s head getting back in the ring was not an easy task. But when I did I won. He wasn’t the best of opponents but he had a lot of heart ( he had about 9 fights I was told )and I tipped things in my favour. I used my head as well as my heart and I got the decision.

It wasn’t the tidiest of fights but I got the job done. It was at that point that I realized that knees even when fighting K1 are sometimes a good thing.  I guess really when you put in enough work the law of averages dictates that sooner or later things change for the better. Really when it comes down to it I’ve learnt that fighting is ultimately more mental than physical and self belief is the key.

Just recently I’ve had a conversation with one of my trainers about fighting Thai and how matching me isn’t easy at present due to my record. If you want to find out more about me as a fighter I’ve updated my ‘About’ section so you can check it out there.Needless to say my record for my current gym isn’t too bad, but overall it’s not too great.

It’s taken me a while to  realize that I’m not a terrible fighter. I’ve had good days and bad days the same as everyone else.  I’ve had some people tell me that I am a  tough opponent and some people tell me I am different to when I began and I’ve got better. To myself I am just myself. I am just a boxer that is doing his best and I want to see how far I can get and really I know that I’m getting better too.

I keep training and keep competing and bit by bit I improve. I’ve learnt the most about fighting by getting in the ring and fighting, and most importantly I’ve learnt how to win. A lot of that of course, is due to my trainers but also it’s due to the fact that I take every fight as experience and regardless of the outcome I always try to learn from it.

I read a great article this week on fighting records on a Muay Thai blog called ‘Under the ropes’ by Emma Thomas who fights for Master Toddy’s camp in Bangkok. You can find it here. I’ve been feeling pretty low this week and reading it helped me put things into perspective.

I talk a lot about being better and improving and changing, but I think it’s just as important for me to be happy with what I’ve achieved and where I’ve got to so far. This week I’ve almost forgotten I won my last fight, and just on that basis even though I know the fights will get harder I’m just as determined as ever to keep competing and make sure I get some more wins under my belt. I should be fighting Thai again later in the year so as always I’m looking forward to the challenge when it presents itself.

I’m not looking for an easy ride but I am focusing on getting better because I know that if I want to keep doing this I have to. I have faith and I believe in myself, which is what matters the most. Earlier this week walking home from training a homeless guy clocked a Thai boxing T shirt I had on. I saw him looking, didn’t think anything of it but as I was walking past he shouted out ‘I like that T shirt mate!’ then after a pause ‘show them your best!’ When it comes to me and Muay Thai I guess that’s still  the plan.

So next week I’m going to have to pull things back a little despite a desire to plow on ahead as usual. I’m not very happy and not myself inside. I’ve spent the past 24 hours giving myself a hard time and maybe I’ve lost that battle this week, but like with everything else I only ever come back stronger. I thought I would share a video of a great fight from 2010. Pakorn vs Pornsanae. I hope it inspires you as much as it does me. Have a great week, and just like the last time… I’ll see you on that road.

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