It’s been a short week of training this week due to other commitments that I’m going to be pleased to have out the way soon. At points I think to myself if there was a prize for plate spinning I’d would definitely win. That aside, it’s going to be good to be back next week and being honest the past few weekends spent getting my social life back off life support has been a lot of fun. I guess it goes back to balance. There’s a ying and yang in everything.
Later on this year I’m going to be fighting again, and as I mentioned last week for the time being it’s good just to be training. Sometimes I love training for the sake of it. What I love about fight training is that it gives me focus and let’s me work towards a positive goal. I guess really that’s the whole point of training anyway. To set positive goals and to improve your skills and yourself too. I’ve found that anyway. I’m very pleased to say the guy sitting here writing this today is not the same person who was here around 10 years ago. Being honest I’m glad he’s gone. If martial arts has taught me one thing it’s that we should always strive to be the best we can be. And just as importantly it’s taught me to believe in myself.
I think I’ve always been strong inside, it’s just that Muay Thai has made me stronger. At points in my life I haven’t always respected myself how I should and like most people in life I’ve made some incredibly bad decisions. Just like with fighting it’s not really about what I lost but how I’ve come back that’s made the difference. I’ve asked myself before what makes me keep going back and stepping in that ring time and time again? What makes me keep training and keep going? It’s not like there’s nothing else I could be doing with my time. After all It’s not like I’m a great fighter and I’ve got a lot to learn.
Yet here I am, and I’ve suddenly ended up winning a couple of fights after doing nothing but losing and it’s like suddenly I’ve realized. Suddenly I’ve seen it and I know that I can be more than what I am. The will to succeed slowly begins to out weigh the self doubt that found it’s home in my heart for such a long time. Yet despite that doubt I kept going. I kept believing in myself because I knew I could do it. And in the end I did. So fuck the little voice (and these days it is little) that tells me I’m not going to get any better. That tells me you’d be lucky to win any more fights. Because I believe in myself and because I do I’ll prove those doubts wrong time and time again. And you know what? I’ll have a lot of fun doing it too.
And so next week and the week after that I’ll train and I’ll train. I’ll stay focused, stay on it and step back in that ring with fire in my heart and a will to succeed, because I know that if I believe in myself then the world is mine. I hope that you feel the same. ‘Go forth with courage and a peaceful heart.’ I’ll see you on the road.